You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
