Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
