talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
