weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
