I need help removing her.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
