What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
