You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
