I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
