i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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