so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize