and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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