The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
