operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
