you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I just want to make out with him forever
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
