North Korea, Best Korea!
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
