if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
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