You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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