His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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