Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Did I show you my penis last night?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
