some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
