All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
