I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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