Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
