gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Oh god it's open bar.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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