yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
