Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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