D3 body, D1 cock
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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