she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
