She is in my trunk
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
