At least make sure they are 18
Why
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Randomize
