So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
