Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
