But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
