At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Randomize
