He is such a slut. More and more my type.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Found your dick twin last night
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
