The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
