Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
