he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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