can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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