You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
