sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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