Plan B is the new Plan A
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He had one of those small greek statue penises
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
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