That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Randomize
