I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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