If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
