my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
