direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
