he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
