let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
