Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
